Top Ten Advantages to LHD Coming Online
Posted by Hazel Stone | Filed under Ephemera
Tomorrow, the Large Hadron Collider, the world’s largest particle accelerator, comes online. Some believe this heralds the end of life as we know it, the utter destruction of the Earth, and/or a rise in fuel prices. We here at Casa de Ligne know better, and here are the Top Ten reasons not to fear: Resulting [...]
Tags: creating news where there is none, international, science-y
A Little Perspective
Posted by Hazel Stone | Filed under Buttinskis
I’m sorry, people, but the culinary sins of Rachael Ray far outweigh any dubious fashion choices. If you’re going to hate the little midget, at least do it for the right reason. And how about a round of applause for Dunkin’ Donuts, for the most egregious display of corporate spinelessness in recent memory. Sometimes, DD, [...]
Tags: creating news where there is none
Quick, Everybody Panic!
Posted by Hazel Stone | Filed under Administrative
From NLB, a fine takedown of the moronic nanny-state notion of banning nail guns because they’re *gasp* dangerous. Time to close the “hardware store loophole”! We need to shut down Home Depot and Lowe’s immediately, people. Do you know how many stabby things there are in those stores alone? Not to mention poisons, electrical thingies, [...]
Tags: creating news where there is none, point and laugh, use your head
Molehill Reconstruction Project
Posted by Hazel Stone | Filed under Oddly Not Satire, Yellow Press
Honestly, what’s the hubbub? Republican Rep. Douglas Bruce’s remark, which drew gasps from the House, came during debate on legislation to help immigrants get temporary federal visas to ease Colorado’s shortage of farmworkers. “I would like to have the opportunity to state at the microphone why I don’t think we need 5,000 more illiterate peasants [...]
Tags: color me confused, creating news where there is none
No Happiness-Dispensing Ponies, Either
Posted by Hazel Stone | Filed under Buttinskis
pan·der (pndr)intr.v. pan·dered, pan·der·ing, pan·ders 1. To act as a go-between or liaison in sexual intrigues; function as a procurer. 2. To cater to the lower tastes and desires of others or exploit their weaknesses. I’d like to submit a third definition: to write a blatantly fellating piece about a political candidate, loosely disguised as [...]
Tags: bad chemicals, creating news where there is none, print media is obsolete
C U Next Tuesday
Posted by Liberty Belle | Filed under Buttinskis
Oh, such a fuss. Jane Fonda’s relevancy is right up there with the city of Berkeley’s, so who cares what the old bag cares to let fly. And really, what in the name of Andrew Jackson happened to Meredith Viera? Are those actual jowls? (I know the nicest fellow, sweetie, I’ll give you his number. [...]
